Decisions, Decisions!

I had a week filled with many decisions to make. I needed new eyeglasses and I think I should have taken a friend with me that would give me an honest opinion selecting new frames but I didn’t want to impose on a friend’s time, so I did it alone like all the other times. I selected the frameless glasses. I like them but the Progressive lenses are a pain to get used to. It is not my first pair of Progressive either.

I fussed with the position of my computer monitor, my chair and even enlarged the font.  Heck, I should not have to enlarge the font with new glasses! I’m still very annoyed with these new futta, futta, glasses!

I was told by the eye doctor that I have to wear them all the time now instead of just for reading and computer……Ugh! I’m trying to be a good patient and wear them for a week like I was told and try to get used to them…………but damn……the fine print is still hard to read, if I got a new script to improve my vision………I should be able to read it with no effort! The only good feature that I selected that I like is the transitional so they turn into sunglasses when outdoors which allows me to read a book by the pool with comfort.

More decisions, I still have to have a handyman come in my house to do some work and two reasons are stopping me, one being financial and the other, I’m not sure what choice to make replacing a mirrored wall with what color paint and I’m sure the wall will need some repair as well so I’m told? I obtained several estimates and took a step further and contacted the Licensing Bureau to make sure the companies are insured as taking down a wall of mirror could be dangerous if the person got hurt, I don’t need someone slapping me with a lawsuit. Well, as it turned out, one company did not have insurance or workmen’s comp so took him off the list………………Ugh……………Sigh!

When I find myself facing a complex decision, I have to do a balancing act and weigh what is truly important to me. It may sound selfish, but it’s not. It is essential for me to make the best possible choices. In the past, I remember when most of these similar decisions needed to be addressed, my husband used to make for me or when I lived in New England, my brother-in-law and nephews would all lend a helping hand and I never had to pay for labor. I always had help and now facing all my decisions solo gives me reason for concern.

I hate when someone pressures me to make a decision that I’m not sure of. I may start out with the best intentions but I need to be motivated to carry it out, and may live with regret of my decision because I didn’t think it out thoroughly. I don’t like being pressured.

More decisions, my Primary Care doctor left it up to me regarding when I can go back to my Silver Sneakers Class after my knee injury. I was hoping she would give me a time frame as to how long she thinks it may take to heal????????????????? I tried going back the other day and it was too painful……….Yeah, that told me I needed to rest up some more………I miss my classes. I miss the gang there too. Getting cabin fever.

I guess self-awareness is the key to how the best decisions are made.

You are on the top of my list for Valentine's Day!

On Valentine’s Day,

when I think of the people

I care about and value,

you are at the top of the list.

Like a rainbow

glistening through the rain,

like a glowing green spring

after a cold gray winter,

you are a joy and a delight.

Like a good book, a cozy fire,

or a cup of cocoa (with marshmallows),

you are a comfort to me.

I appreciate you.

~By Joanna Fuchs~

Happy Valentine’s Day!

Get real picky - really picky!

Be picky. I have always set high standards for myself and I don't settle for less. It starts with self-respect. Respecting others is very important as well. All goes hand in hand of what your mother taught you. I don’t believe there are mothers out there teaching their children to be disrespectful bullies and complete morons!

I stopped reading boring emails that say it might have something in it you need to see, or watching violent nightly News that leaves me feeling helpless and afraid. I could care less about the celebrity sightings; they only make you feel like everyone else is living a great life but you.  Nope. No good!

Who cares what celebrities are doing, what they are wearing, who is cheating on who….who gives a damn?  They are all landing in Rehab these days so all that wealth and fame is not doing them any good.   And get over the Designer clothes. I wear what I like…

I do admit most times when I look at the label, it might have a designer name in it but it was selected because my eyes liked the garment first and not the label.

Years ago, before retirement, I learned to stop listening to the latest drama story at work or to the friend who's been complaining about the same damn thing for years. Ugh.

It's exhausting and it's creating a pathway that leads to nowheresville. We have all had that kind of friend in our lifetime. Time to dump them! Seriously! Enough with them having pity parties on your time and dragging you down into depression.

I learned to get real picky - really picky! I also remembered what my mother told me about selecting my friends. I also applied this theory to who I select for my doctors, my hairdressers, my dentist, where I shop for groceries and also department stores.

Be Picky! I select quality organic foods to put in my body and I also like a bargain like everyone else. I’m not ashamed to cut out coupons and see the savings at the end of that receipt. I also like the coupons for the department stores for the discounts and check for online coupons as well before making a purchase. Don’t forget to check for the free shipping and handling!

We have all experienced moments in life, when we feel burdened by situations beyond our control. Perhaps there is a serious situation or the threat of a layoff, or a rebellious child or grandchild - whatever the major issue is……….we have no choice but to feel pressure and completely overwhelmed by the weight of it all. Yikes!

I would rather take a good book out to lunch than a friend who's made "woe is me" her personal motto for life. And, that possessive friend that hates it when you spend time with other friends. What’s up with that???? Dumb!

After becoming a Widow, I have read many inspirational books whenever I felt the need for a good dose of "feel good" thoughts.  The libraries allow you to hold onto that book longer than they used to and you can make this request online now if you decide you need two more weeks!  Cool Beans!

As a matter of fact just recently, a dear classmate, friend recently recommended a great book titled “The Last Time I Saw You” ~ by Elizabeth Berg ~ Recommending a book to read came at the right time while I'm still nursing my injured knee from my fall and waiting for it to mend.   It is a novel about women and men reconnecting with one another—and themselves—at their 40th high school reunion.

My gym has turned my life around. I don’t just do boring machine routines. Different exercise classes makes me enjoy exercising! It is also nice meeting new friends at the gym. A variety of friends is a good thing.  Well, right now, my injured knee has put my gym classes on hold until I mend.

(Mama was right - you do become the people you hang around with ) Good friends are very important to have in your life.

A good life starts with good thoughts.



Practice Mindfulness!

I recently fell in my house! I was on my way out the door and went back inside to make sure I turned off my curling iron.

It is always off but for some reason, I have to double check every time. Well, I slipped and fell and took a Dixie on my shiny, hard, tiled floors in the hallway and came down real hard on my right knee! Ouch! 

 

I was in a hurry to get o my Pedicure Appointment that I have been looking forward to since I received a gift certificate for my birthday at the beginning of the month from a dear friend for this Pedi at Susanne’s, so I was anxious to be on time. I’m always on time no matter where I go so there was no reason to be in a hurry in the first place.

Well, it hurt lifting my foot from the gas pedal to the brake pedal while driving to my destination. When I got there, I went in the back room to pull down my jeans to see the damage….Ugh. Nasty, swollen, red, skin peeling……….Ouch!

Suzanne only has a small tiny fridge and only had cans of “Coke” to apply to my knee. Thank goodness only all girls were there as I sat in my bloomers with a towel wrapped around me from the waist down! Not a pretty sight!  Jeans are too tight to roll up above the knee so they had to come off so I could feel the cold from the cans of Coke.  Oh my.........LOL

My toenails sure look pretty but I was in great discomfort. The two glasses of wine helped! I couldn’t wait to get home and apply ice to my knee.

LG, I’ll remember that you declined to buy a bag of frozen peas for my injury because it was a $1.69 for such a small bag! Hehehhehe

I called my doctor the following morning and she reminded me that I have to practice mindfulness, as many trips and falls happen when we’re in a hurry or not thinking about what we’re doing.

She told me to practice focusing all of my attention on what I’m doing when walking and watch where I place my feet and to pay attention to the journey and avoid thinking about the destination…..even if you are only walking from the bedroom to the kitchen.

Same applies when outside, watch for tree roots, uneven pavement, garbage, slippery leaves, fallen branches, etc.

Yikes, I got the talk! The talk given to most older seniors!...Sigh!

Government Monopoly!

Our Society continues to get worse!

I have learned throughout the years to never talk about politics, religion, etc. because it only opens up an venue for a heated argument with others, as we all have different views and opinions but lately, even if I try to avoid the News on TV, it is boldly hitting me on my Welcome screen on my computer the first thing in the morning.

I know now why my insomnia continues to get worse; it is because I stay awake to watch the 11:00 PM News filled with senseless tragedies like the most recent shootings in Arizona. It leaves my mind filled with horror and rents space in my head for days because of all the updates that follow on our daily News.

So, they lock up the crazy 22 year old and the taxpayers have to pay some 20 odd years for him to be in prison. I find something wrong with this theory.

What a waste of money for all these prisoners that are eating free, a roof over their heads free, free water, free gyms, free education, free representation. Makes me sick especially to the ones that killed innocent people.

Then we have to hear all about the local politicians who point fingers of disdain at corrupt public officials yet the people continue to elect them over and over again.

We need to become a civilized society again. We have to have the ability to disagree without being disagreeable.

We are an intelligent bunch, I’m sure the politicians can meet on common ground. We don’t have any other options, yet we have these stubborn idiots that get paid well, fly on private jets, have the best healthcare and even get free expensive haircuts on our dime! Hmmmmmmmm! Sounds like they get special treatment like the prisoners!  Why do we treat prisoners and politicians like royalty?

 

Frazzled!

I learned to recognize that things are what they are, regardless of perceptions. I have to accept things as they are and not as I want them to be but I’m stubborn and I find it hard to accept certain things “just the way they are”. Strange, sometimes we welcome change and other times change takes us out of our comfort zone.

I try to check-in with myself now and then to see if these perspectives are working for me. I recently checked in my own radar system and said to myself…. I will never be alone on Christmas ever again. As I get older, I have to learn to gain greater inner control and smooth out the rocky road of life!

We have all heard Financial Planners on TV such as Suzie Orman say: Pay yourself first. Well, I think this theory applies to other things such as: Be good to yourself, trust yourself, know what you want and need. Put yourself first! I need to let my feelings be known. My feelings are important.

My girlfriend and I were discussing “feeling important” not that long ago.

Every time I need something, I talk myself out of it. Even if I can’t have it, it’s ok to need. Where there’s a will, there’s a way!  We both agreed that we have to transform frustration into an achievement.

Then I learned to get some perspective and step back and look objectively at the reasons why I get frustrated. I zeroed in and focused seriously on this matter and came to the conclusion that I don’t feel important.

Perhaps the distance between me and my family due to living in different states is the cause…….you know “out of sight, out of mind”. I was dwelling on the closeness I had for years yet now seems to be vanishing away and it scares me the older I get.

I know my frustrations were telling me something. I just had to find it and bring it to life and express my feelings. My mind was all over the map jumping from one issue to another. Gosh, I was a total mess over Christmas all because I was alone. It is terrible to be alone for Christmas. I come from a very large family and I was never alone. 

So, with nothing to do that day, as all my friends were jetsetting to visit their family, it only made me dwell on my “To Do” List and that most things on that list I don’t know how to do!  Sometimes, things just become overwhelming for an older women to do things around the house and handle repairs and make decisions and then try to figure out how the hell am I going to pay for this????

I was a little upset with myself because when I was younger, I was able to handle these matters that pop up but the older I get, I get the crazies trying to methodically find the right contractor, or can just a handyman take care of these freaking issues.

I remember when I was able to paint, wallpaper and dance around a 6’ ladder with ease. Well, I fell off of that freaking ladder not once but twice so NO MORE ladders for me so hence, no can do repairs nor do I want to do them either! Enough of this, when does it ever end?

They say: Life is what you make it. No one is responsible for your happiness, sadness or success. No one but you. Yes, you! We all have to take complete responsibility for ourselves and our choices we make are the ones that the allows us all to take that journey toward personal fulfillment.

I am well aware that accepting responsibility without excuses, frees your power to achieve. I know I'm responsible for my own wellbeing footprint!  But no one told me it all becomes more difficult to do all this stuff when you are alone and older!

OK….that venting felt good for a while! Oh the stress!  This rocky road has so many obstacles to climb.

Oh, and I won’t even discuss the new computer issues and troubleshooting, reading and more reading. Researching and more researching. I’m exhausted….where is that bottle of wine?

Whereas, Windows 7 has some nice features but I really liked my XP, it also seemed faster.

Things to Ponder About!

~ I ponder about what will be on that list for us to say goodbye to at the end of 2010?

That list of people, brands and products and companies that have been a part of our lives for many years. I know my car is on that list that they no longer make anymore. My old computer will be on that list too, as XP…….. I think was everyone’s all-time favorite. Vista didn’t cut it so I’m grateful to now have the Windows 7. It is taking some time getting used to as I am one of those XP lovers.

~ A friend once mentioned to me that she designated me to clear her computer history if something should happen to her!

~ Nothing is more embarrassing than that moment during an argument when you realize you are wrong.

~ We all need a sarcasm font don’t you think?

~ What’s this I hear, they are not teaching the kids how to write in cursive in schools?

~ Bad decisions make interesting stories to tell.

~ I wish Google Maps had an “Avoid Ghetto” routing option.

~ Gosh, I love technology but it’s getting expensive to keep up. Can we all agree to ignore whatever comes after Blue Ray and IPad? Enough already! And, I love the stuff but it is getting to be overkill!

~ I still find it difficult to fold a fitted sheet properly……..don’t you?

~ Obituaries should include how the person died.

~ Families should get together more often. Life is too short!

~ Every state should outlaw texting while driving and walking on the sidewalk bumping into people and trees! And, also that cell phone glued to their ears while driving is very distracting. I get so furious especially when I see a car seat with a baby in it while Mom is texting away or chatting away. Don’t they care about safety?

~ Restaurants should outlaw cell phones ringing and annoying others that are trying to enjoy their dinner but instead are forced to listen to other people chatting away. Come on people, where are your manners?

~ Companies should be fined when they leave automated messages on your phone!

~ How come every time I exit out of my “Word” document, they ask if you want to save your changes when you have not made any???? But, be careful, it will change the date on your document if you click “yes”.

~ What do you ponder about?

Happy New Year 2011

Hugs, Rose

Christmas E-Mail

I have a list of people I know, all logged in my computer, and now at Christmas time I have gone to take a look.

And that is when I realize that these names are a part, not of the computer they're stored in, but of my heart.

For each name stands for someone who has crossed my path sometime, and in that meeting they've become the rhythm in each rhyme.

And while it sounds fantastic for me to make this claim, I feel that I'm composed of each remembered name.

And whether I have known you for many years or few, in some way you have been a part of shaping things I do.

And now that Christmas has come, I realize anew, The best gift life can offer is having friends like you.

 

Old Friends!

All through school, my friends and I all lived in a constant proximity to our age peers and made friends almost without effort. Later on, especially after marriage, many of us grew apart and failed to renew. Then we found each other again and what a joy for all of us!

Old friends can cheer us up, provide a sense of community and continuity, share memories because they new our parents, rejoiced in our triumphs and commiserate in our sorrows.

I’m blessed that I have renewed my long dear friendships from elementary school to high school until today! I also do a separate blog just for them. Yes, I’m blessed. We are such a special bunch for sure! We share what is going on in our lives and we genuinely care about each other.

It’s unrealistic to believe that one friend can meet all our needs. A few treasured friends and some if we are lucky are relatives too adding richness to our lives and we share decades of memories together.

Other friends enter our lives for a reason and then they are gone. But even brief friendships can have a purpose and value. As vital as good friends are, less than good friends can suffocate you and may need to be jettisoned.

There are no friends like old friends who knew you “when”….knew your parents and siblings and matured into adulthood with you. So, if you miss your old friends from the old neighborhood, why not look them up and have a get together. I just had one last October with my Forever Friends and had a blast. Some travel from other states like I did for these luncheons and some still live in the old neighborhood. Oh, the memories and the pleasure it is to see them all again. They are like mini reunions.

 Fortunately for me, I visit the old neighborhood at least twice a year because my family still lives there so I have the opportunity to see my friends during my visits. Our 50th Reunion will be in 2012.  Oh my, where did all those years go? 

How many of you still keep in contact with friends you had from school days?

Try tracking down long lost friends by either looking on the Internet through Google or other search engines…….try Classmates.com or Facebook and you will be amazed of all the long lost friends you will find. Go to your Reunions and have a blast from the past.

I’m blessed having my Forever Friends in my life. They mean a lot to me even though we are miles apart. I wish I were traveling up north for the holidays but my budget is tight and I’m in need of a new puter so perhaps I’ll go up again when I find a reasonable airfare.

I will miss seeing my children and family and the snow at Christmas time. Remember sticking your tongue out to lick the snowflakes coming down? It just doesn’t feel like Christmas here in Florida……never did. Plus, Santa wears shorts down here!

Giving Thanks!

A dear blogger friend, (DB) wrote the following in one of his posts recently:

“I once worked for a chef. One day during a slow period we all sat down to have lunch. The chef ladled out a bowl of soup for himself. Then he took a slice of bread out of a package in the refrigerator. He normally baked bread in the morning but for lunch he would use store bought bread. I watched him as he carefully studied that slice, turning it over in his hands a few times.”

“I asked him if he thought there was something wrong with the bread. He said there was nothing wrong with it, and then he talked about American farmers, wheat fields, the big machinery that harvested the wheat and left it in windrows to be picked up, put into a truck and taken to where it was processed into flour. He told about how the flour would be poured into large cloth or hardy paper sacks, loaded onto trucks and delivered to consumers.”

After reading DB’s post on his blog, my mind kept thinking about it every time I made myself a sandwich. It rented space in my head. Do we just give thanks only on Thanksgiving?

Now, it makes me think every time I eat a meal and recognize the dozens of people who did hard work to get food to your table…..the farmers, the grocery store clerks, the friends and relatives or restaurant chef who transforms raw vegetables into a bowl of delectable soup or side dishes.

During my last trip to Boston and while having lunch with 20 of my dearest friends at a local restaurant, one of our friends (Joanne Nardone) said grace before the meal. We all agreed that her words were absolutely lovely and coming from the heart.

Saying grace with a group of people around the table suggests not only the grazie of thanksgiving but also the calm, gracious elegance of living fully and well. Something we all don’t take the time to do.

I know I don’t find grace rushing around, gobbling down food, eating over the sink or eating too fast and polishing off a meal in 5 minutes.

I now try to sit down to eat all my meals and say a small prayer all my by myself to give thanks that transforms a meal for one into an act of celebration, focus, gratitude and Giving Thanks!

Oh, and thanks to “DB” for my thoughts while preparing this Post.



Veteran's Day!

November 11th

Veterans's Day honors all members of the Armed Forces who who served this country valiantly, and in a very big way. They served and fought to protect us, to keep our country safe, and to preserve our way of life. Veterans gave their time, and risked their lives for you and me. In some cases, they made the ultimate sacrifice.

The brave men and women who serve and protect the U.S. come from all walks of life; they are parents, children and grandparents. They are friends, neighbors and coworkers, and an important part of their communities.

We are all proud of all who served our country.  I have five (5) brothers:  two were in the Air Force and three were in the Army.  I remember, as a young girl how I prayed for them every night.  It was a joyous time when they all returned home!